He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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