I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
