Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
