I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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