Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
Randomize
