Your mouth is God's brothel.
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
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