everyone is single if you try hard enough
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize