I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
