At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Randomize
