That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Randomize
