Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
there was a trapeze. enough said
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
