Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
