I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
last night I used snow as a chaser
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize
