I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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