Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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