I just made out with a guy for $7.
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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