Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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