omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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