Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Oh god it's open bar.
Randomize
