I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Randomize
