weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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