you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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