Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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