Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
