I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Boobs are out for the taking
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
I am mentally ready for anal.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
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