I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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