i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
