would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize
