I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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