Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
