i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
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