He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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