Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
