Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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