O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
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