i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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