Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
