i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
