Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
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