another moral hangover. fuck.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
