he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Randomize
