Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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