my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
