So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
