People with herpes should wear stickers.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
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