Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
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