Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Randomize
