At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?