I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I'm at about main and main street
21 Distraught People Found Out They Had An STD
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
21 Ladies Reveal The Sexiest Thing A Man Can Do In A Public Setting
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.