i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
