so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
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