Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize
